July 3, 2010

Expiration Dates

by @ 11:07 am. Filed under food, observations on life

Image from Creating Passionate Users

You know how M and I decided that we were going to enjoy men like we enjoy food, well it would be nice if they had some sort of expiration or “best if used by” date.  Last night we had CSA Friday with Owen’s dad and the scientist.  [As usual, we made a mountain of insanely good food.]  Anyways, the scientist had requested hummus and we had a long debate over the shelf life of tahini.  It had been living in the fridge for over a year since it was opened, but it smelled fine (Believe me, rancid sesame is not a good smell).

This morning while I debated the need to stay in bed vs. the need for coffee I pondered the whole, “How do you know when it’s over?”  There’s no expiration date, bad smell or curdling to look for.  There’s no pop up timer, or life meter (or game over for that matter).

Any suggestions or signs to look for?  If any of you says, “you just know,” I will send one of my people over to kick your ass.

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2 Responses to “Expiration Dates”

  1. M Says:

    Non-returning of phone call/txts was the sure sign that 10HRDG was done. I think that’s an easy sign. It shows general lack of concern. And I’m not talking about needing phone call backs or text backs within 30 seconds or anything, but hours even days of radio silence is one of the clearest signs for me. It does this crazy thing to me, makes me want to call more, test more. Then it all going spiraling down the toilet. Go figure, if some men could just actually be men and say they were done we wouldn’t have to go searching for the signs.

    To me it’s like men say they don’t know how to tell if women are interested ect… Well for us women in a relationship, we don’t know how to tell when they’re not interested anymore.

    So dear readers, just a little thought on my part; Be adults when it comes to relationships, say what you mean, and if you’re not interested anymore (i.e. the relationship is expiring), for the sanity of all others, say something!

  2. Keely Says:

    I always avoid not knowing when to end it all by giving a guy three strikes. The “three strike” method has never steered me wrong. I developed it one year when I got stood up for New Years Eve and vowed it would never happen again. Here goes:

    The guy gets three strikes, ie, three times to mess up before you cut him loose. No second chances, and no excuses from either party are allowed after the third strike. Once he’s on the last strike he’s on thin ice and you can advise if necessary.
    So I have been advised by a guy who was upset he didn’t know the game that this should be explained to them before hand. So you might want to explain the rules and keep track of what strike they are on. (ex: You showed up two hours late for our date with no explanation tonight, this is strike two you know!) Communication is key here.

    So to explain, the strikes are anything distasteful the guy could do within the realm of your relationship that you deem them to be, but they must be outlined in detail to the subject.
    My favorites are: Saying he’s going to call at a certain time and not doing it, making plans with you but then ignoring them or breaking them, being rude, acting like a douchebag, being annoying…etc. It’s up to you. If him leaving his underwear on your floor drives you crazy, and it’s really a deal breaker, tell him.

    Some strikes are what I call a home run (all three strikes at once). This will get your ass cut instantly… these would include abusiveness or other psycho behavior, cheating, drug use or finding out he forgot to mention he has been in prison. There is really no explanation needed.

    Once the third strike has been indentified, get out. No ifs, ands or buts, it is time. If a guy can’t respect your feelings and acts like a jerk that much in the beginning of the relationship, he’s probably not going to get better. You might as well move on. Sometimes it takes a while for the three strikes. Sometimes strikes can be taken away if they do something incredibly cool, like apologize sincerely, say they will never do it again, and then not do it. Or buy you a mercedes. But you will know what kind of man you are dealing with. There will be a pattern of behavior to watch for. This technique succeeds in making you aware of how much this guy really messes up if it’s on your radar. It also ends the “what do I do? conversations you have over and over with your friends. You know what to do. After he stands you up for the last time on Saturday night, Just dump the loser and move on…

    Try it and see!

    Keely

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