Tis the season where there are a rash of people changing their status on facebook.  Granted, there are just as many people flipping to single as there are people getting married.  I’ve been on facebook since 2007 and I have NEVER changed my status.

I am chronically single.

At times, this is fine.  I revel in being unsupervised.  I get to be a honey badger.  I do what I want. But then there are times, like now, when I telework from my nest in the bell jar.

Why?  Since late March I have acquired 7 bridal clients. 1 April, 2 May, 3 June, and 1 October (and October gets bonus points for planning ahead).  I have a fairly broad spectrum of clients (although it isn’t quite the United Colors of Benetton).   Some good, some bad, some crazy.  Regardless, I get to work on the focal point of their special day.  A day I have never envisioned as part of my future (The reasons for which could be a very long post.  Let’s just say I am way to practical for my own good.  I haven’t managed to be in a relationship longer than 2 years and that was only once.  So there is no point in daydreaming about such things.).

Most seamstresses avoid bridal work like the plague. Brides are crazy (the other market to avoid is prom dresses).  I took it on because I decided it was wise to get the extra cash while I could (Most small business owners in Austin experience low sales when school is out and things don’t pick up until ACL weekend).  While I have extra cash in my pocket, it may just drive me mad.  I joke about this all being material for some sort of psycho-thriller where a spinster seamstress finally snaps and hunts down her former clients.  Jada Pinkett-Smith would play me.

Maybe my next move as honey badger should be to pack up all my stuff and hit the road.  My lease is up in October.  Stay tuned.

Moon by E. Lim

I wrote that for a friend who is going through an ocean of  problems.  My life issues are a mere kiddie pool in comparison. I had been thinking back to needs and wants lately.  I’ve prevented myself from wanting the moon because of the pain related from never getting it.

There I’ve said it.  I want things.  I realize I can’t have all of them in this lifetime, but I would like to snatch up as many as I can.

Whether you are 34 or 14 it isn’t any easier telling a boy that you like him.  I did so this past weekend (via email because I was too chicken to say it out loud).  It was that or be stuck living the life of Watts in Some Kind of Wonderful (One of my favorite John Hughes films.  I have a thing for gingers.).  I had a hunch that I would not get the same ending as the movie (below).  Instead I had a panic attack related to the “I like you” email and ended up day drinking with Meg and Chris. Then there was the long wait until that evening when the let down email arrived.

With all the stress affiliated with the sale of the house, I look back and think that I was more stupid than brave to take this on.  I now had one less person to lean on.  But at the same time, I really needed to rip the band-aid off or risk an even bigger let down when he found someone else.

So here’s our girl Watts snagging the hot ginger.    I am off to figure out what plan B is.  So far it involves Speed Dating on Saturday evening (hopefully I end up with more than a blog post after this one).

After prepping and enduring a crazy weekend of work (2 garage sales back to back for 2 different people along with an extremely last minute custom job). I decided that it was time for a break.  I was NOT working this weekend.   If I were magic, I would have managed to get myself out of a work trip to Texarkana as well.

The week moved quickly. Bridal fittings, Texarkana, planning my outfit for a wedding over the weekend.  The light at the end of the tunnel was the midnight showing of Cowboys and Aliens.  I am not a big fan of alien films but I do enjoy a good western.  Since she show just came out, I will not give out any spoilers.  Just know that the action starts 2 minutes in and keeps you on the edge of your seat.  It could use a few plot adjustments (or maybe a less tired version of me viewing it).

Friday I wrapped up a few things related to changing my address.  Then it was off to the very fancy Violet Crown Cinema.  Front row seats (best seats ever) to Beats, Rhymes and Life: the Travels of a Tribe Called Quest.  Yay for 90s hip hop and documentaries. Part of me wonders if they will be touring or releasing an album in the wake of the film.  Only time will tell.  IN the meantime, check out the trailer.

Life is busy as usual.  But if it wasn’t, why get out of bed in the morning?

As I try and figure out what I want to be when I grow up, I’ve been working more hours on things that aren’t my day job in the hopes of keeping my options open.   I’ve even taken on a few bridal clients, but in between these jobs I managed to have some fun projects roll though.

A friend of mine asked me if I could make a Harry Potter robe.  I asked if it was for HP7.2.  He said yes, but it was also for life in general.  I laughed and decided it would be fun to make that happen.  I made his robe and then I gave in to the HP hype and made my own robe (Ravenclaw of course).     Then we joined the rest of the fans at midnight to see the show. It was good to have a night off.  Life is short so why not make the most of it (even if it means wearing a polyester wizard robe in 90 degree weather).  I don’t plan on discussing the movie.  Other than OMG! Neville got hot.

The next day I got word that a friend of mine had passed away.  She had been sick for several years but you always try and hope for the best in situations like these.  It was a strange day.  I felt like I was on autopilot.  As much as I wanted to be of help to her family and friends, I wanted to be selfish and revel in what I had.  I ended up spending the afternoon with Meg.  Then I drowned my sorrows in the world of Harry Potter (The Highball threw a great party to mark the end of an era).

Several of my friends have just now resolved to eat in more and brown bag it for lunch.  This is not a foreign concept for me so I decided to post my week in vegetarian (minus milk and cheese) living or as I prefer to call it, vegan plus butter, eggs, and honey.

Saturday: mad crazy cooking day.   I try and get ahead by prepping things when I have time.  I made whole wheat quinoa biscuits, a vat of Spinach lentil Curry (to be heated with couscous later in the week), 4 servings of curry pot pie ( the rest of the curry for to-go food), Brown rice (for stir fry during the week), pizza dough for Saturday dinner ( the rest was frozen for friday nights in).

Here is how I did: (more…)

So most people these holidays are fearing a little pat down by the TSA. I fear Christmas cards/letters.  The majority of the people I want to keep in touch with are on the Facebook.  If not, I find a way to keep in touch with them.  If you don’t hear from me at all during the year, something says that I have moved on.

So here is the deal. I am still getting Christmas cards from people I stopped speaking to at least 5 years ago.  They actually stopped speaking to me first.  [I may have done something slightly not so PC at the time.  But whatever, such is life and if they can't handle it, I don't need them (BTW, if a guy did what I did, he would get a high five and maybe a free beer).]

So, I digress…  anyways, the card isn’t just a carbon copy of what everyone else gets.  They actually have taken time out to write something personal (on their already personal couples photo card).  “Hope to hear from you”, or “we read your blog and it looks like you have had a great year” or “keep in touch”.  And no.  I am a hard core grudge holder.  Once you are out, you are out.  I may go from extremely angry to civil and can tolerate your presence for an hour or so, but to be honest.  I am still not a happy camper.

… Thanks but no thanks,  I will take the pat down any day.

Key to M's House

As some of you know, I spent about six months living in a store display.  My house was on the market and it had to look “lived in” but not cluttered or have any personal items.  In other words I was living in a house, not a home.

Living in a house void of personal items was stressful.  I keep a clean house but I am a bit like Monk.  I am OCD about my things.  I don’t like sharing and I don’t like knowing that random strangers have been in the house possibly touching my things.

After six months and two realtors (I will spare you the details of that experience),   I was homeless, both literally and figuratively.  Did I sell my house? Nope.  It has however become a home once again.  It has a family now (more details I will spare you of since I am not ready to write about that experience).

So where was I living?  For the last two months I have been living in “my” room at M’s house. Drunk housing became my home and the majority of my belongings were in storage.  I wasn’t sure how that was going to play out.  But I was truly grateful that I had a place to call home.

It has been years since I had a roommate.  Sure, M and I live together for a week or so during SXSW, but that is different.  That is vacation (…and we are a lot like the Odd Couple.  She’s Oscar and I am Felix).  This was full-time job/commuting Jen. Jen who deals with stupid people all day and spends much of her weeknights hermitting in her workspace.  Now it was Jen, sans workspace, living with 3 roommates.  I did get a few sanity breaks here and there.  There was house-sitting for Yenta and some cat-sitting with streaming Netflix.

After a long search and a pause to round up enough money to pay rent and a deposit, I found a new place.  It’s not quite home yet.  I am still rounding up my belongings around town and there is some decorating to be done.

After a two month stint in cohabitation, I realize that it’s not the life for me.  I like knowing that the crumbs on the counter were left by me and I am the one who left one square of toilet paper on the roll.  I think adjoining houses is as close as we will get.

M this one is for you.

Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros “Home” from Edward Sharpe on Vimeo.

Garth Algar: Uhm, Wayne? What do you do if every time you see this one incredible woman, you think you’re gonna hurl?
Wayne Campbell : I say hurl. If you blow chunks and she comes back, she’s yours. But if you spew and she bolts, then it was never meant to be.

And so it began.  M and I decided that it was a good night for drinking and walking down to Scoot Inn.  I was feeling a little icky that afternoon (allergies) but I felt a little better after dinner.  We had a drink before we left the house (M had 2).  We had Sweet Leaf Tea and bourbon (very strong) on our walk.  After an attempt to walk slowly but we ended up at Scoot in record time.  What to do?  Leave the beverages outside the gate?  Keep drinking?  Umm, keep drinking…actually, let’s just chug these.

We were drunk at this point in time. We went inside and the evening gets a little fuzzy.  I recall running into a friend and having a drunk conversation with her (we may have actually run into her twice).  Then I remember M and I going to the restroom.  Then I remember M getting a drink and me getting water.  At some point in time 2.0 showed up (his plans were canceled).

The show was great.  I took some drunk photos (I will post them soon). M went up to the front and shot for a bit.  Then things got fuzzier. I don’t think I missed anything.  Amanda only has the one album out so the show went pretty fast.

After the show ended I needed to lean against the wall.  Unfortunately there was an overhang and pretty soon I was trapped in a pocket of cigarette smoke.  Not good.  I felt like I was going to hurl.  Then I did.  Just a little, in my mouth.  I fled the venue and found a trash can.  Then I felt better, then much worse.  I went back inside and hurled in the bathroom.  Was it the right restroom?  Not sure, I think it was.

At this point in time I needed to sit down.  I remember finding M and getting more water.  Then I sat shivering at the picnic table.  Somewhere M had procured some sunglasses (apparently there were giveaways) and a signed poster which ended up in my bag).

When we got up to leave I got about 6 steps away from Scoot and started spewing again.  Not good.  M stood there and let me wipe my face with her scarf.  That is a real friend.    We stumbled home arm in arm.  Rarely do I need M’s help,  things usually go the other way around with me looking after her.  But it’s really nice to know that she is always going to be there for me.

Everyone needs a little adventure in their life.

M, The Jew, and I had planned a trip to Chicago back in May (I think).  When I say planned, I mean M and the Jew were drunk and bought tickets using M’s leftover Southwest credits.  The real plan was to stay at M’s Parents place for a week and eat, drink, and sleep to our heart’s content.

As the date for the trip drew near we were no more prepared than we were in May.  Seriously, things have been a bit of a train wreck lately (more on that some other time).  We recklessly packed our things (including some dirty laundry) and managed to get to the plane on time (we also managed to squeeze in shots of bourbon before hopping in the cab).

The flight was horrible. Turbulence and poorly behaved children.  We hoped that it wasn’t foreshadowing of things to come.  I had planned to sleep through the entire flight (It’s been a rough week).  No such luck.  After 20 minutes I woke up.  I put in earplugs but they weren’t enough to drown out the voices of the kids behind me.

When we landed in Chicago it was pouring.  The luggage coming in at baggage claim was soaked.  Then yet another delay,  the ramp was closed due to lightening.  They were holding our luggage hostage.  Then M’s dad was stuck in traffic and wouldn’t be able to pick us up.  Three sad faces.  We were tired and needed a snack.

Things eventually came together.  Our luggage and our ride showed up.  We arrived at M’s parents place safely.  We were fed and put to bed.

Day 1:
We woke up rather early. There are routines at the Parents’ house that interfere with sleeping in.  The “plan” for today was to go to the Korea street festival and go out for indian food on Devon Ave. Done and done.  Bonus: a cool picture of M with a 40 of Sake and a straw hat.

We roamed around the mall after our food crawl.  The Jew needed sunglasses.  No sunglasses, but people watching and heckling was in full effect.  When we got home I went swimming in the sweet “R” shaped pool.  Then it was a quick LAN party to upload pictures from our adventure on to the FB.

After dinner we wanted to go out and see some Chicago nightlife. It was fairly uneventful.  Apparently Chicago’s version of Hipstertown had been overrun by yuppies.  We plan on going back to the last bar of the evening.[get name from M]. Since M was driving, the Jew and I were drinking.  I came home drunk.  The Jew was somewhere in between drunk and tipsy.  Needless to say we needed food.  The Jew wanted White Castle for some strange reason.  Thanks to the iPhone we made that dream come true.  I had indian leftovers at the house (Excuse me, why can’t more places serve veggie hashbrowns?).

Day 2:
Up at 11am.  Yes, we got to sleep in.  I don’t know what time we came home and passed out. The menu for today was Chinese and Thai.  M and the Jew actually went running this morning.  I do not run <strike> (I will probably swim later)</strike>.  We got a late start leaving the house. Today’s menu was Chinatown.  We went to lunch at Joy Yee’s (4pm is now lunch time).  Then we roamed around.  Sunday night is “family” dinner at M’s parents so we ended up making a small feast in their kitchen (I love the accessibility and granite counter tops).  We stayed in the rest of the night eating and drinking.  Needless to say, we slept well once again.

Day 3:
Today I was up at 8:30 for some strange reason.  We made it out of the house by 11.  We hit the field museum.  DINOSAURS! Then it was off to fancy dinner at Custom House.  The food was ok.  It was well thought out but poorly executed. The textures were off.   We ended the night dancing at Fizz.

Day 4:

Today was a full day.  After our usual breakfast of leftovers we headed to the Art institute.   We split up to cover more ground and I ended up seeing the whole thing (I could spend days in there). We made plans to go out to for tapas at Emilio’s with M’s family.  Yet another feast.  I was tired.  I passed out after dinner.  M and the Jew went out for drinks.  I didn’t even hear them come home.

Day 5:
The Jew’s last day in down.   Not so much food grazing today.  We had a low key day.  Chicago Safari.  Frank lloyd wright houses, Oz park, and   Licoln park.  M and I have dinner with an old friend.  Surprisingly decent indian food for the suburbs.

Day 6:
Lazy day.  M and I slept in.  I had to scan some paperwork to refinance my house.  we hit the Costco and the H&M. Then it was Green Zebra for dinner.  My favorite fancy dinner so far (there will be pictures).  We drank A LOT at dinner. Then we met some friends for drinks later.  Chilling out before driving home was a must

Day 7:
We went back to Uru Swathi for brunch.  We got to go orders of samosas and aloo gobi before leaving Devon ave.  We had planned to lounge by the pool before leaving but it was looking pretty dreary.  We ended up packing and chilling out.

Overall it was a great vacation.  I spent more money than I intended but at the end of the day, you can’t take it with you when you go.