Archive for the 'rants' Category

MYOB

by @ Thursday, May 31st, 2012. Filed under observations on life, rants

For the life of me I cannot fathom why someone had the audacity to inquire about my financial health when theirs is on serious life support.

Seriously.  This happened.

Them: Are you making what you made at your old job?

Me: Fuck no.I was making $50k when I left.

Them: are you making, like $35?

Me:  umm, no. Much less than that.

Them: Enough to make rent.

Me: Yes

Them: We need to make you more money.

Me: Why?  I have no debts.  My car is paid for.  What do I need more cash for?

I think the conversation stopped there.  If it didn’t I blocked it out.  The inner dialogue in my head took over.  This person must live in an alternate reality of unicorns and rainbows or something.  I am a nanny and a small business owner. These are not the jobs that yield swimming pools full of cash.   I used to be gainfully employed in a job that I didn’t like very much (nor did I have a Scrooge McDuck style swimming pool of money).

What I should have done is brought up their salary, the mountain of debt they have, and the fact that they are a long way from digging themselves out.  But that’s not my style.  I went for the parable style lesson.  Since they thought I was “poor” they were offered water instead of tea and brownies.

 

 

 

 

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SXSW 2012 Recap part 2

by @ Tuesday, March 20th, 2012. Filed under concerts, fashion, Music, rants, sxsw

SXSW is over.  The rain will wash away the dirt and stench that overwhelmed downtown.  Another year has taught me that I enjoy indoor shows with seating way more than the outdoor ones.  The sound is better, the people tend to be more civilized.

Here’s how the rest of the week went.  I am still deciphering my notes from SXSWi panels.  Stay tuned.

Day 6, Wednesday:

Day 7, Thursday:

Day 8, Friday:

Day 9, Saturday:

 

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SXSW 2012- Recap Part 1

by @ Wednesday, March 14th, 2012. Filed under movies, rants, sxsw

It’s been ages since I have posted anything here.  M and I have been extremely busy.  Most of you know how to find out about our side projects because you follow us on FB or Twitter.

Both of us managed to take time out to return to our volunteer gigs. It’s my eighth year and it’s  too sweet of a deal to pass up.  We work the entire week before SXSW and then we get to make use of those badges.

Now that interactive has come to a close I will let you know what I have been up to.  Stay tuned for a more in depth discussion on some of the panels/movies that inspired me.

Day 1, Friday:

Day 2, Saturday:

Day 3, Sunday:

Day 4, Monday:

Day 5, Tuesday:

 

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Speed Dating – the “upscale” singles version

by @ Sunday, October 2nd, 2011. Filed under dating, rants

I recently had the opportunity to go speed dating for free.  They were short women for the “upscale” singles event.  The first thought in my mind was this…

…a hot guy in a suit.  Ok, so it was 100 degrees and we would be on a patio but, I DON’T CARE!  Ok maybe he would  be in lightweight linen pants and a short sleeved or maybe rolled up sleeve button down shirt.

Or maybe he would be into fashion and look this guy (I am a Refinery29 addict now)…

In my head this man is definitely NOT wearing khakis.  Nor would he be wearing shorts on a Thursday evening after work (unless he was out exercising or on a boat).

What was I wearing?  A simple knit dress.  Clean cut, bat-wing sleave, v-cut hem.  The print was geometric (halston-esque).  I think I had on heels as well.  I was Jen the fashion designer.

Needless to say, this event wasn’t as classy as expected.  The ladies definitely out scored the men on the classyometer (that is now a word). This round I had zero picks.  But to be fair there were four repeats from last time.

 

 

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Hi my name is Jen.

by @ Sunday, August 7th, 2011. Filed under dating, rants

name tagSo the other day I drunk impulse bought a registration for speed dating.    I’ve done it once before and  based on my year long failure of acquiring a date on OkCupid  (more on this later) I decided to take a chance.

I wasn’t feeling awesome.  I was actually running a low grade fever.  I tossed on a black jersey dress, red shoes, and a belt and headed for the Highball.  I walked in, grabbed a soda water with lime and slapped on my name tag.

“Hi, my name is Jen. I am a seamstress and I work in vintage restoration and reproduction. ”

Why talk about the gov’t job that I don’t like?  Besides, I was going for less intimidating.   Over the course of my 13 mini dates I discovered at least 3  more people living dual lives.  Most of them were musicians.  Not bad.

I am not going to discuss each “date” in detail.  My notes weren’t as detailed as last time.  If you want more details, well maybe you should pay for me to attend another one.  I can say that there are two guys  I would actually go out with.  There were two more that I would consider just hanging out with as friends.

What I would like to discuss, is how poorly the event was run.  This was the first time I used this service.  I probably would have reconsidered based on the poor web interface. But alas, I was drunk when I signed up.  They promised snacks and drink specials, what I saw was a sad tray of crackers and after surveying a few attendees the drink specials were few and far between.

If you haven’t been to speed dating before, it goes like this. You put on your name tag.  They hand you a sheet of paper to make notes on (they don’t give you enough so bring your own).  They seat you and your “date” at a table and you get anywhere from 6-10 minutes (this time it was 6) to find out as much as possible about the other person.  They ring a bell when the time is up and they make one gender rotate (this time males rotated).  Usually they give you a little time to write down notes or they tell you when the bathroom breaks are.  Not this time.  To make matters worse, we started out minus 3 ladies, this meant the guys had extra chill time.

After the event, you are supposed to log back in to the horrible website and click on the people that you are interested in contacting. If by some chance they want to contact you as well you will get their contact info.  The site has no personal information to aid in your judgement.  It would be nice if I could find out if either of the people I selected were smokers.  That is a deal breaker.

If anyone at the Highball is listening.  You should run your own speed dating event or “dating game”.  Nerd Night does it.  Get the action pack to run it.

 

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Keeping afloat

by @ Saturday, June 4th, 2011. Filed under movies, rants, this old house

Before I begin my rant.  I need to tell you all to go out and see Submarine.  It’s a film, not a movie.  Another great performance by Noah Taylor and a surprisingly good soundtrack.    I was a bit shocked when I found out that Alex Turner (front man for the Arctic Monkeys) was the man behind these songs.  But, I think that is the point of indie films.  Showcasing new/underused talent.  The last time I saw a film with a soundtrack so shockingly perfect was “Dan in Real Life.”

…and now for the rant portion.  Hopefully my rant is not as bad as this stuff is… (more…)

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SXSW 2011- Day Seven (Does anyone have a wrench)

by @ Friday, March 18th, 2011. Filed under concerts, movies, Music, rants, sxsw

My tolerance for “special” people is tanking.  I don’t know if it is related to the string of violent films I have seen or what,.  My field notes from TV on the Radio at Stubb’s say the following: To the girl with the “serenity” tattoo on the back of her neck,  I have all I can do not go go Rainn Wilson on your ass with my bike wrench. [For those of you who don’t know, that is a reference to Super.  Watch the trailer.  I am glad a wrote that down.   In reality, I would turn her in to security.  I would tell them that she was a danger to herself and that she was probably on drugs.  Why the passive aggressive approach?  Umm, APD doesn’t like brown people.] I think that my surrounding concert mates would have liked to have a go at all the drunkards who felt the need to mosh around to a band that deserves more respect.

Let’s rewind to the start of my day. (more…)

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Unwanted Seasonal Contact

by @ Wednesday, January 5th, 2011. Filed under observations on life, rants

xmas cardSo most people these holidays are fearing a little pat down by the TSA. I fear Christmas cards/letters.  The majority of the people I want to keep in touch with are on the Facebook.  If not, I find a way to keep in touch with them.  If you don’t hear from me at all during the year, something says that I have moved on.

So here is the deal. I am still getting Christmas cards from people I stopped speaking to at least 5 years ago.  They actually stopped speaking to me first.  [I may have done something slightly not so PC at the time.  But whatever, such is life and if they can’t handle it, I don’t need them (BTW, if a guy did what I did, he would get a high five and maybe a free beer).]

So, I digress…  anyways, the card isn’t just a carbon copy of what everyone else gets.  They actually have taken time out to write something personal (on their already personal couples photo card).  “Hope to hear from you”, or “we read your blog and it looks like you have had a great year” or “keep in touch”.  And no.  I am a hard core grudge holder.  Once you are out, you are out.  I may go from extremely angry to civil and can tolerate your presence for an hour or so, but to be honest.  I am still not a happy camper.

… Thanks but no thanks,  I will take the pat down any day.

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Online Dating Douchebaggery

by @ Sunday, July 4th, 2010. Filed under dating, rants

I don’t care if douchebaggery isn’t a word.  I needed a good descriptor for what is to follow.

<soapbox>

I got a disturbing round of texts yesterday about the use of a friend’s photos in their ex’s new online dating profile.  Really?  Specifically about a picture taken with their pet.  Seriously,  pictures with your ex’s animal(s) do not score you points in the sensitivity arena.  How do you handle the questions about said animal in chats or on the first date?  Do you make up a story about how fluffy was hit by a car and it has been a hard few years, but now you can finally deal with the loss?  Inquiring minds want to know.

A long time ago, the staff put together a few lists of profile do’s and don’ts (here, and here).  As always, I say skip using your past to advertize your present self.  How hard is it to get a friend to take a few pictures?  If you don’t have friends, try a fucking camera with a tripod and timer.  My cheap ass netbook does a good job of taking profile pictures.

</soapbox>

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Keeping up appearances

by @ Monday, June 28th, 2010. Filed under confessional, identity, rants

Cross-stitch samplerPeople say that home is where the heart is.  Sadly I am feeling rather vacant in that area.  Home has been my car and an assortment of places I have keys for (BTW if I haven’t said it enough, thank you for giving me keys to your houses).  I am becoming a product of this sterile environment that I return to everyday after work.

For the last 4 months I have been living in a store display.  Apparently to sell a house, the house has to be lived in, yet void of life.  I have to say that living in a store display is taking it’s toll.  Personal items are stashed away in drawers and boxes.  My sewing gear is mostly packed away because I don’t want people touching it (Note to visitors: It is not appropriate to touch a seller’s personal belongings, nor should you use their bathrooms).  Books and DVDs are in the closet to avoid clouding anyone’s judgement on the purchase of my home.   I can’t even cook here.  People looking at houses do not have the same appreciation for the smell of butter and garlic that I do.  The longer the house is on the market the less it feels like home.

Today I went to work on the verge of a meltdown (If you know me, you know I don’t have breakdowns often).  I told my boss that I was going to stay in my office and put myself in time out. Why?  I knew it was a bad day when I dropped the f-bomb within 5 minutes of entering the building.  I was pissed. I busted ass and spent a rather large sum of money to have the interior of the house painted. Why?  To encourage a hasty sale of my home.  Sadly, the open house on Sunday drew in a single buyer and they weren’t interested.

Normally, I don’t bring personal into the business place but after 4 months of living in a store display I can’t keep it together.  I thought after 2 days of virtually nothing but chick flicks I had cried enough tears to feel too exhausted to be angry.  Instead I spent the day pissed off and listening to punk rock.

After work I decided that it was in my best interest to go to one of my temporary homes (the one with the streaming videos on demand) and chill out.  I watched a film (I think it should be categorized as a film) about a dysfunctional family, “Rachel getting married.”  I was crossing my fingers that it would numb the anger.  Otherwise I was going home and breaking dishes in the back yard. It wasn’t until now that I fully understood what was meant by this quote from High Fidelity. :”… I want to feel something else than this. It either that, or I go home and stick my hand in the fire.”

Yes, it’s come to that.  I told my mom that this house thing is making me crazy.  If I hadn’t just blown a ton of money on painting the house I would have a month and a half of rent in the apartment I should have been living in by now.

So what’s next?  No fucking clue.  I cannot afford rent and a mortgage. I appreciate the offers but I do not want temporary housing.   I do not want to unpack until I am in a new place.

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